06/09/2023 - Another milestone that has opened a new chapter of life.
It was janmashtami, we knew we wont be decorating house or be part of celebration this year as i had OT booked for 4:30 pm the same day. 38th week 4 days, i had a big heavy moving live soul, tempting to come out in open. I cooked breakfast, some nuts for fast and had prantha aalu as last meal before starting for hospital. Cashew was crying as she knew next 5 days, i will be away, we kept soothing her with a mixed emotion of brnging her sibling back home. Imagining another little twirly toylike baby in our arms was next to impossible, but this was going to be true soon. I was afraid, bit of palpitation , happy but stunned thinking of pains and gains of next few days.
10:00 am
We started for hospital, on the way got video calls from neha priya and nitin. with me were best wishes of all we did formalities for admission. As it was janmashtami, craze was all around to have krishna being born in house, 27 deliveries to happen that day, hospital staff was loaded with sudden crowd of deliveries that day.
Sonu arrived and i felt hungry, we went to a eatery nearby, i wasnted to eat all tasty things before OT, i asked for veg Puff, sonu went to fetch it, Suddenly someone in red shirt, a little tired hefty man asked me, you have OT booked for today, we affirmed, he said you cant eat 6 hours before OT, its dangerous. I remebered a movie we recently watched over te same topic, a kid dies during appendix surgery as he ate something before surgery. We called our doctor and understood she forgot to instruct us for this..
I with that large tummy in black W kurti with pastel green bathroom slippers, went to preliminary investigation room, Mohit in his red t shirt and blue pant with files in hand stayed outside room, i wore hospital dress and slippers. I was shaved and urine tested. Now i was lying in bed waiting for a call from OT room. While being in bed i felt sad and angry for not getting a chance to have bar B q american corn a day before.
I knew next 40 to 50 days after child birth i will be on holistic diet which suits new born's breastfeeding mother. I knew it would be ceassarion after all my efforts for normal delivery. It has been all 9 months i wanted to be loose for last 2 days and eat all things i love roam places i wanted to. I craved for papdi chaat and american corn Mohit took me to "Red Hot Chilly Pepper" restaurant due to lack of time and i agreed reticently.
While waiting on hospital bed, i felt urge to tell mohit, that i wanted to say NO for other restaurant. I agreed unwillingly. Why less assertive people are not understood clearly? I wanted to tell him before going further.. I felt What on earth i am thinking when i was going to be under major andominal surgery in few minutes, but i stood up and went out of room looking for him to tell him same. I saw his back, he was talking to a nurse far away in hospital corridopr, i waited for him to turn, he went to lift and went away from my sight.
They tied my hair, gave me a hair cap, shifted me on stretcher and i started scrolling outside, i saw mohit, i was crying, i said why you were not there outside room when you promised to stay outside waiting room. I said i am afraid and i had tears... i moved on .. i saw Mohit last time and he said "congratulations for being mother again" waving his hand to me ..
I was among bunch of such stretchers being shifted in and out of room, i was in a corner, was checked again and taken in. I saw my anasthesist last and told her to tell doctor to note baby's birth time correctly as instructed by my mother.. Thats all i remember last.
I was awake.. i cried i screamed loudly .. i held some nurse's hand tightly, one left me i held another's hand I told everyone its paining.. I heard mohit, its a boy i said "how can a boy come out of me" i heard cashu saying chotuu in a mobile phone's video. I was taken to a shared room, for recovery in a corner was my bed.
I saw the lady beside me complaining for fan being slow while i was liking cozy environment, i was lying silenltly felt very difficult to move a inch but i was quiet. They broght baby to me at night asked me to give him feed. i could not sense any motherhood love but was surprised to connect to a little joy again.
I asked a nurse to give me her phone to call my husband, i couldtalk to him, he was trying to arrange a single room for me. At 12:00 i was shifted to separate room. From here started excruciating pain journey for 5 days, Sometimes mohit and sometimes Mother in law with me.. Difficult to eat, difficult to sit, very difficult to move get up and even go for loo or pee.. Days went, i recovered and we came back with little one to home on 10/9/2023
We reached home, i was still looking pregnant my tummy was out, i had a japawali maid ready to look after me and that little baby all on me. Family was exhilarated and everyone was joyful seeing that little cuteness packed in blue hospital onesie. Here we started our journey of interrupted nights, recurrent cries, rare smiles, colic treatments, and smallest thing god can made in human form. its 17/11/2023 today, meeshu is 2 months and few days old. I have started understanding his variety of cries and ask behind.
